As any petrolhead knows, the car community is absolutely huge. Look anywhere on social media or online on the likes of Youtube and you’ll get an idea of how large the community actually is. For me, I’m in many groups on social media and I’m friends with many different wonderful people in countries thousands of miles away who all share the same passion; cars! So why is it a surprise then when I say that nearly every single day, yet another fellow car guy suffers from some form of mental health issue?
It’s no surprise really when you understand that the once-great community we surround ourselves in has now turned into what seems to be a massive row and argument over who has the best or cleanest or even the most expensive car at the likes of meets or even groups. When you have people behaving like that, it is no wonder that one by one people start to leave the once brilliant community behind. Now even I admit that there is more to it than just meets, even if you are like me and you fix never-ending project cars if you don’t get no help even when literally shouting from the rooftops then that can very easily turn you off fixing the car in question and can really affect your head even if you feel fine otherwise. I know this situation all too well as it has happened to me before on numerous occasions and let me tell you, it is not a nice feeling to be in a situation like that at all. It turns out that I’m not the only one who’s been like this at one point in their lives neither.
In some cases, someone could already be feeling down through other things and all the hate and lack of support you can possibly get in the current car scene pretty much tips them over the edge. With mental health issues being so broad and being very well hidden (especially those who are men), It’s very easy to judge and come out with stuff without realizing what’s actually going on inside someone’s head. I’ve been unfortunate enough to see this enough in a good few mates I’ve made through the car scene and it isn’t easy to watch whatsoever, especially when you consider them to be good mates of yours.
All is not lost however, all the stuff I mentioned above is easily reversible, in fact, it’s one of the easiest things to fix. First of all, and I know this sounds daft but if someone you know needs some help and they live close by then simply suggest and ask if you can give them a hand, not just will this get you busy but it’ll also help out the people involved.
Don’t ever put anyone’s car down, whether that be to someone’s face or even behind their backs. The main issue with the car community is everyone’s opinions bouncing off each other and once they become conflicted causing an argument that’s when things get bad and it’s simply not needed. Regardless of if it’s to your taste or not, its not a nice feeling for someone to put hours and hours of blood, sweat & tears into building their dream build just for it to be shot down in flames because one person doesn’t like a certain part or a certain way someone has fixed or modified something.
If someone you know is feeling down and needs taking out of their slumber they’re in, there is a lot of things you can do that can & will instantly boost said person(s) mood pretty much tenfold. Whether their car is on the road or not, one of those activities you can do is take the person to a well-known petrol-heads place of interest, whether it’s ‘Caffeine & Machine’ in the UK or even to a ‘Cars & Coffee’ event, these types of places are brilliant for talking to people and sharing the love of cars.
Even a simple convoy with a few like-minded mates to a well-known tourist attraction has been known to boost people’s moods pretty much straight away. Nothing makes a car person feel better than going out on drives with good mates on good roads, the memories stick with everyone involved for years on end as well which is a pretty good feeling as well.
If like me you are involved in a lot of amazing car groups, get to speak to some reoccurring members of the groups to find out where there might be some events you could both could go to, regardless of size it gets a gaggle of people out from the current situations they might be in and for a day or so, they forget about everything that is currently wrong and embrace themselves in the moment and for that, they’d forever be thankful. Groups I would personally recommend are both ‘Motorheads International’ or ‘RPM365’ due to their wonderful helping, caring members creating an equally amazing atmosphere. There’s hardly any hate in any of these groups and the admins are always on top of things if things start to get iffy, these two groups alone feel like a massive family instead of a typical car group.
The last point I’ll make is a simple one but yet so poignant. If you really want to help anyone who is having mental health issues regardless of what it is, simply sit down and listen to the person affected and support them the best you can. whether it’s by joining them in a game on a games console or even being around them in other ways, listening and support go a long way to help someone fight their insecurities and current issues. It’s very easy to try and make out that it’s nothing important and that it’s just a phase but for a lot of people, it is a whole lot more serious than just that so instead of trying to be the big man by ignoring desperate pleas for help, simply listen to them and support them the best way you can.
Hope You Enjoy!
By Alex Jebson